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Hiatus No Longer!
March 7, 2010. Sunday
To all my readers and affies...:
I apologize for my extended hiatus and absense from my website. Ive been struggling with some big life changes that {also} included lack of internet access for a time, but most of all.....
IM PREGNANT!
yes folks its true! I found out January 6th 2010. As of now I am about 13 weeks along, which puts me at the beginning of the 2nd trimester! This is such a blessing and wonderful time I want to commit to journaling all the wonderful adventures! Back soon with stories...my second prenatal appointment is tomorrow! 
categories: pregnancy
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categories: pregnancy
ugh...
August 14, 2009. Friday
got my period tonight.
I feel like a dumbass.
....welcome to my fuckin' life.
In other less ineresting news I've finally uploaded a blogging cms and its working wonderfully :) it's cutenews . I'm actually pretty impressed with it. I was hesitant to try it, but its a really simple and powerful tool. And I'm very pleased the layout is totally freeform :D . Thats a huge prerequisit for me with any cms, especially a blogging cms. Im very satisfied, i'll be integrating a tutorial on it soon to help out anyone else who may find it useful.
Well, I'm very very sleepy. At work right now {as usual} and need my third cup of coffee. So for now I say adeu' , see you soon.
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well i managed to coerce my man (drag, really. i mean lets be honest here) down to walmart to go get some more prego tests. Yep. I caved. And god punished me by making it invalid. That means one of the lines thats supposed to show up for a viable test didnt show up, so the whole thing is a sham.
categories: pregnancy
paranoia
August 13, 2009. Thursday
noooooooo...
so, like any sane minded woman would do i ran down to the local walmart to grab another 2-pack.
this time i was extreemly careful. i put my pee into a cup and put the absorbent tip thingy in for exactly 5 seconds, kept the tip facing down while i put the cap on, and immidietly put it face up on the bathroom sink. Im like a pro.
it is now three days after my expected period.
...still negative.
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resit the urge resist the urge resist the urge...
...oh. er. hello. Im at work right now, getting paid $14.00 an hour to blog. not too shabby, i'd say :) . well, im trying so hard to resist the urge to take another pregnancy test. wait three days, just like the instructions say! but oooh no. good ol' pregnaphobe me is thinking about that pee-stick like an alchoholic thinks about margaritas. I dont know what the hell is wrong with me. its like im obsessed with knowing, despite overwhelming evidence of my previous test being (-) negative. I mean, i held that baby up to the light and saw no pigmentation whatsoever that could make me consider its a (+) not a (-) . sigh...
fuck this.
Honestly, I would be ok if I am prego. A litte sonner then i'd like, but its doable. plenty of people have kids at my age. hell, they usually have more then one! and it kind of warms my heart to think of a little soul growing in my belly. But the "limbo" period of not knowing your prego or not seems to just absolutly drive me insane. I want to know now! not "maybe. wait a few more days." ugh.
change is a scary thing. i think, even if its something happy like marriage, kids, moving, or getting a new job...its still kinda scary. Humans are creatures of habit. Even when staring in the face of a life that desperetly needs change, or a bright future, we hesitate. not because we dont want it, but because of the fear of the unknown . Im the type of person who relinquishes control of my life to fate. most everything, i beleive, happens for a reason. things happen at the exact moment they do to serve your life the best lessons you need to know. But for me i guess, pregnancy and having a baby is so... intimate . I have to endure my body changing drastically, and my life never ever being the same again. Not to mention how it changes my relationships with everyone in my life!
i am so irregular though, taking pregnancy tests is not unusual for me at all. I've been doing it almost every month for over a year because my cycle has been all over the place. sometimes im regular, sometimes ive been 1 week to 2 weeks late and everywhere inbetween. So this madness isnt new to me. its probably why im comfortable with being prego (if i am). thats just a reality ive had to face. albeit a reality that is hugely exaggerated by my tendency to over-worry and over-think everything...but a reality all the same.
oh, i dunno. i dunno what to think. i flip between thinking "your crazy. its 99% accurate when you took it." to..."but what if you didnt calculate right? what if you messed everything up? took it too soon?"...well, im gonna try really hard to wait until thursday or friday to take another one...
no promises though. :]
categories: pregnancy
indecision and critical thinking
August 13, 2009. Thursday
...oh. er. hello. Im at work right now, getting paid $14.00 an hour to blog. not too shabby, i'd say :) . well, im trying so hard to resist the urge to take another pregnancy test. wait three days, just like the instructions say! but oooh no. good ol' pregnaphobe me is thinking about that pee-stick like an alchoholic thinks about margaritas. I dont know what the hell is wrong with me. its like im obsessed with knowing, despite overwhelming evidence of my previous test being (-) negative. I mean, i held that baby up to the light and saw no pigmentation whatsoever that could make me consider its a (+) not a (-) . sigh...
fuck this.
Honestly, I would be ok if I am prego. A litte sonner then i'd like, but its doable. plenty of people have kids at my age. hell, they usually have more then one! and it kind of warms my heart to think of a little soul growing in my belly. But the "limbo" period of not knowing your prego or not seems to just absolutly drive me insane. I want to know now! not "maybe. wait a few more days." ugh.
change is a scary thing. i think, even if its something happy like marriage, kids, moving, or getting a new job...its still kinda scary. Humans are creatures of habit. Even when staring in the face of a life that desperetly needs change, or a bright future, we hesitate. not because we dont want it, but because of the fear of the unknown . Im the type of person who relinquishes control of my life to fate. most everything, i beleive, happens for a reason. things happen at the exact moment they do to serve your life the best lessons you need to know. But for me i guess, pregnancy and having a baby is so... intimate . I have to endure my body changing drastically, and my life never ever being the same again. Not to mention how it changes my relationships with everyone in my life!
i am so irregular though, taking pregnancy tests is not unusual for me at all. I've been doing it almost every month for over a year because my cycle has been all over the place. sometimes im regular, sometimes ive been 1 week to 2 weeks late and everywhere inbetween. So this madness isnt new to me. its probably why im comfortable with being prego (if i am). thats just a reality ive had to face. albeit a reality that is hugely exaggerated by my tendency to over-worry and over-think everything...but a reality all the same.
oh, i dunno. i dunno what to think. i flip between thinking "your crazy. its 99% accurate when you took it." to..."but what if you didnt calculate right? what if you messed everything up? took it too soon?"...well, im gonna try really hard to wait until thursday or friday to take another one...
no promises though. :]
categories: pregnancy
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welcome to my first official post! :) . It's just your typical tuesday morning...and i'm freaking out! ...nothing, like, apocalyptic or earth-exploding... just what happens when a girl is late on her ahem "time of the month". Now just to give you some history. I am in a committed relationship and have been for the last four years. I love this man more then life itself! But I'm a bit of a "pregnaphobe"
It's not that I hate kids, or dont want to have any of my own. No! Not at all! Its just...I dunno, the concept of change. Nothing changes life more then having a baby! When I think about it, its a strange mix of happiness and excitement and nervous anxiety-attack.
Honestly, most of the friends I went to high school with are pregnant, or already have kids! Sometimes its mind boggling to think about...
But thats just a fact. ...A fact of life.
Ugh. Im really frazzled right now. Sorry for such a bounce around post. I was up at 6 am today cause I couldnt sleep and I still have eight hours of work to look forward to later tonight! I think its time for a snack and a nap... ...Oh. I guess incase your wondering my result came back (-) . Thats negative. Technically Im one day late, so that should be 99% accurate...but of course I'm still freaking out with my still absence of my period . Like I said: pregnaphobe. lol.
categories: pregnancy
the (+) and (-) test...
August 13, 2009. Thursday
It's not that I hate kids, or dont want to have any of my own. No! Not at all! Its just...I dunno, the concept of change. Nothing changes life more then having a baby! When I think about it, its a strange mix of happiness and excitement and nervous anxiety-attack.
Honestly, most of the friends I went to high school with are pregnant, or already have kids! Sometimes its mind boggling to think about...
But thats just a fact. ...A fact of life.
Ugh. Im really frazzled right now. Sorry for such a bounce around post. I was up at 6 am today cause I couldnt sleep and I still have eight hours of work to look forward to later tonight! I think its time for a snack and a nap... ...Oh. I guess incase your wondering my result came back (-) . Thats negative. Technically Im one day late, so that should be 99% accurate...but of course I'm still freaking out with my still absence of my period . Like I said: pregnaphobe. lol.
categories: pregnancy
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 Danielle bio: 5'3, age: 22 sign: scorpio location: utah, united states occupation: cable tv techincal support company: comcast alias’s : facebook twitter disboards yahoo description: I'm the type of person who is kind of shy and quiet when you first meet me. I warm up really quickly though. The people who know me best would describe me as very thoughtful and intelligent. I use big words whenever i speak and often hear "I dont even know what that f#@!* word means!". I always have a travel selection of books that follow me wherever i go. The car, the office, hell if my purse was big enough i'd have some stashed there too! I love paper stores (think office depot) because blank paper is insanely inspiring to me. I have a sarcastic sense of humor and offstandish vibe that sometimes makes me seem impervious to feelings; but the real me is very sensitive, intensely emotional, overwhelmingly kind, and unconditionally loving. ♥ likes: popcorn , sparkly/shiny things , spaghetti strap tops in all colors , my red jeep wranger ♥ , anime , italian food ,
sunshiny summer days , books books and more books! (i love books) , stargazing , camping , my little pony , taking care of potted plants , cherry 7up , tarot cards , sushi ,
will ferrell , dane cook , writing fiction stories and informative articles (can you tell? lol ) , facebook , murder mysteries , and most of all... DISNEY WORLD !!! dislikes: humidity , city traffic , people who dont recycle , zucchini , the color yellow (on me) , negative attitudes ,
bad boob jobs, excercise commercials, diet food , dora the explorer , people who act like the world owes them , hardcore conservatives , interest rates , people who say "like" , "uh" , "dude" too much favorites:
movies : transformers ♥ , tommy boy , step brothers , pirates of the carribbean tv shows : family guy , snapped , natgeo documentaries , dr. 90210 , south park authors : martha beck , elizabeth haydon , peta heskel , robert jordan randoms:
ok, stepahine meyer. i loved the twilight series. i mean absolutly adored! but whats up with 'breaking dawn'?! what were you thinking? wheres the action,
wheres the conflict, where the hell is all the cool shit that made the first three books so good?! you could have atleast made the whole jacob thing a little
more dramatic {he is my favorite, btw ♥} not so "omg everything is ok now. i dont love you anymore. yay." ...WTF! and the ending? terrible.
nobody died, nobody got hurt, everything is hunkydory...and finally, you could have devoted a whole freakin book to bella being a vampire. half a book, seriously?
i disney world is not just for kids. i dont care how lame i sound while saying this; but i love it there. it is positivly the most fun, most enchanting, most amazing place man ever built. you better 'effin beleive i'll go there until im on my death bed. y'all can burn in hell. {and i mean that in the nicest way possible :} quotes
"industrial-strength night-vision goggles! holy santa clause shit. Can you imagine if we had these when we were 12? even better.
We got them when we're 40." - step brothers "do you wanna go do karate in the garage?" - step brothers "why do writers write? because it isn't there." - thomas berger
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